If My Heart Could Write Songs It Would Sound Like This

I was with Annie yesterday and she played me the most amazing song, later that night I listened to so much there's just something about it that hits me hard. It's beautiful

This is for someone I will always love with every piece of myself

The Story by Brandi Carlile

All these lines across my face
tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
and how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
when you got no one to tell them to
it's true I was made for you

I climbed across the mountain tops
swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and broke all the rules
but baby I broke them all for you
because even when I was flat broke
you made me feel like a million bucks
you do
I was made for you

You see the smile on my mouth
it's hiding the words that don't come out
All of our firends who think I'm blessed
they don't know that it is a mess
No They don't know who I really am
and they don't know what I've been through
like you do
I was made for you

All of lines across my face
Tell the you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
and how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
when you got no one to tell them to
It's true I was made for you
It's true I was made for you

Long Time No Writing

to my faithful and interested readers! sorry I haven't updated in so long, things here have been hectic! Tests in 2 classes this week, 2 tests in one class next week, 3 projects currently at least 2 of which I am behind. crap. I still worry that sometimes college isn't for me but I don't know other times I know it is. I know that I need this base before I go out into the real world and make a fool of myself. I just wish my major didn't cost so much money. Besides tuition I have to supply all fabric, tools, and patterns myself. I know I shouldn't expect the school to pay for my supplies but it just sucks when you don't really have the money ya know! On the funny side....I've joined the kickball team! It's really a "just for fun" team so I'm not too worried about sucking (which I know I will) Oh! and I've finished my skirt! Sorry I didn't finish my following of it, it just got to complicated to explain. But as soon as I get it back I'll post pictures and everyone can stare at awe of my work hahaha. Looking forward to next semester and the fashion show. I'm one the stage commmittee heads so I get to plan out the stage and how it will look. IT. IS. GOING. TO. BE. AWESOME. The theme the dark side of Alice in Wonderland, so the stage is going to be kinda creepy and trippy. yeaaaaaah! Anyways other than a lot of freakin schoolwork not much is going on. Apparently I might going with some friends to Madison for Halloween and my friend Matt thought of the perfect costume for me. ok ready? I am going to be the ipod ad person! swweeet! it's gonna be crazy fun. I hope.

Time Keeps On Slippin

So I finished a cd project for Relaxation today, literally right before class started. This is not me. I told myself to do it over the weekend or by Monday afternoon at the latest. However Monday my computer broke down on me so I had to give it up for two hours in the afternoon (the two hours I would have been using to work on my project) so I procrastenated another project until today so I could do the cd Monday night, and I got nowhere in 3.5 hours. Stupid internet in the dorms is going shit slow and keeps knocking me off. Finally I get so frustrated I give up for the night. I hate doing stuff at the LAST minute (I don't mind doing stuff at the second to last minute though) but this is what it's come down too, stupid internet, so me and the internet are currently not speaking. AND I finally got a TV! BUT there's no cable plug in on my side of the room and my roommate's using her side fully (plus she's never watches TV) SOOOOO so much for being able to watch my shows now :( Since Thursday there hasn't been a lot of ups. some, but not a lot. not enough. I'm done having a crappy life, appparently God's not done giving me one though. I know I shouldn't blame him, but it's so much easier. I just don't understand why it's so hard to be happy for me, like full happy to the point where you feel like you are bathing in it, I feel like I can hardly get a sip. I love it at Stout don't get me wrong, but I still feel empty like something's missing..............

Re-fell in love with Craig Armstrong today and for some reason can't get enough of this song....it's like he's singing for me :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqKaZCaAykM

Career Conference

So I had to go to a Career Conference the school holds every year for an assignment for 101. Now, had I been really looking for an internship I probably would've been way excited, and it was still really cool but I felt weird asking about internships and working when I really wasn't going to act on anything. However I got to talk to Target which I love, not only for what they sell but how they work with communities and are eco friendly. It's strange to think about working for such a big company for me, I'm NOT ruling it out it's just a little strange is all, proof that I have no idea where I might end up. Still going through career conference I thought about how much I want to be an independent desginer doing my own work and putting it out there for people who want it. I guess the whole corperate idea just scares me. I don't know if I'm exactly anti-corperation but I've always had a different flow and being a part of that feels off in a way. I don't know, we'll see. Maybe someday Elly Liebsch will be working for Coperate America, hahaha oh boy America better watch out...when I get there......hehehehehe

Making the Skirt part 1

ok, for my own nostalgic reasons and becauase I want to feel important I am going to take you through most the of processes that I will be doing to make my skirt. First pick out a pattern (I am doing skirt D the short pink one) and fabric. True up your fabric before you start anything (this simply means to make sure the fibers in the weave are perpendicular to each other) fix it if you have to by pulling on the bias (pulling the fabric diagonally) then make sure the salveges are even (or very close to) and your fabric is pretty much ready. Ok so once you have the pattern (and of course your body measurments) you can pick which size to do. This is actually a pretty tricky part to explain so I won't go into details remember however, sizes for patterns will most likely be bigger than the sizes you buy from the store SO DON'T BUY THAT SIZE go by body measurments to pick your pattern size. *some of the size difference comes from seam allowance* So now I've got my pattern, my size, my necessary pieces cut out (I won't go through alterations either because I didn't have to do any yet), and my fabric ready. So I ironed my pattern pieces because they got wrinking from being folded and carried around. You may also need to iron your fabric if that's wrinkly, sometimes it's good to prelaunder it too in case of shrinkage. (whew there's so much to do before you get to even sew) Once that's all done pin the pieces to your fabric, the instructions with the pattern will show you how to lay them out most effectively but I haven't follwed that yet. In any case make sure to look at it so you know how to place certain pieces that may not be on grain. Most pieces (all of mine) are pinned with the grain (the dominate weave (horizontal or vertical)) some may have to be placed on the fold to so DON'T CUT THE FOLD, unless told too. Make sure your grain line on the pattern piece is parallel to the edge of the fabric or you piece won't be on grain. After pinning you get to CUT (exciting!) the process is a little nerve racking for me, but fun becuase you finally feel like your getting somewhere! Lay your pattern pieces in neat piles and tada! that's it for now because that's all I've done so far!

whew.

don't worry there's more. >_<

On other notes, can't WAIT till Halloween I just want to see my friends again. There's something about your friends none of them are really the same, so it's akward because up here no one gets the jokes that I usually tell and no one really likes the same things as my old friends. BUT I'm not complaining. I really like the friends I've made here, Carissa and I got way closer over the weekend which I like because Annie spends a lot of time with Matt, who I'm sure doesn't care for me (why I don't know) who cares, I spend time with everyone and enjoy it! Classes are good, I always have the feeling I have so much to do yet nothing to do at all. Weird. Oh I wish it was next year, I want to have a house so bad, and I really want a dog next year. I know just KNOW I shouldn't get one but I'll cave, because I love dogs. Besides dogs always love you and I want someone to love me. Something I still haven't found here. oh well I don't care that much. Except if that excuse makes it okay for me to get a DOG! Also I applied for the head of a couple committee's for the fashion show SAS puts on. Funny enough they want me as a committee head but not for any of the postions I applied for (which was music, garments, and modeling) instead they want me a Stage Committee head which means I help design and put up the set for the runway. I find and request all the materials that we need to run the show (lights, sound) and work with those people to find the best lighting and such. At first I kinda freaked out because I wanted soooooooo badly to be music committee head and it seems I've done a lot of failing at things since I got here so I felt like I failed (again.) I kinda feel excited now. I'm really dedicated and have alot of passion, in fact I feel like set is a pretty big part of the show. Whoo hoo! wow. ok. I really want to take a shower but won't yet. mmmmm.

p.s. guess who's getting new hair sometime soon(ish)

oh yea.

me.

just wait.

bet you can't.

neither can I.

Construction Project 1-DONE!

ok, so for our first project in construction we made a tote bag, I made mine out of duck cloth which I like but was a pain for the pattern we used. It took me one full hour to turn the straps right side out after sewing them. Pressing was also tricky with this fabric (actually pressing is always a little tricky). It took two days of lab hours and two different pockets but I eventually got it done. We also did a boxed X stitch (which is infact a box with a X in it) on the straps however the duck cloth was too thick to fit under the foot of the machine so I sewed mine on by hand stitching and instead of doing a regular box did a cross stitch box with a X in it. I also sewed some patches on mine to both hide the quality of my stitching (not good) and spruce it up! I surprisingly got a 9.2 out of 10 on the bag so I'm really happy. I was getting the feeling that maybe, even though I love sewing, I was just no good at it and so not cut out for it. It really sucks to have that feeling but I have to keep telling myself that practice will make it better. hopefully. Halloween is coming soon and I still have no idea what I should be, my fallback in case I don't come up with anything is Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. or perhaps Ms. White from Clue. who knows. Costumes for me are a big deal (ok anything dealing with clothes is a big deal for me) so if I do Halloween it's all or nothing! On another note, in textiles (a class in which I am doing better than I thought I would be) we have a project due October 20th sounds like a lot of time but really it's a big freakin project so it's not much time really. It's fun though to work on, we have a list of woven fabrics and have to find them in magazines or the internet, print the picture and the caption explaining it, define the fabric used, explain why they used that fabric and if it was a good choice or not. We have to do this 25 times. FUN! yet not fun. On other notes school on a whole is good, making friends, got a new roomate, loving my major! It feels wierd for the most part I'm happy but I miss my friends at home, no one here is quite as crazy as them. It's just so fresh here, I can really feel my life moving forward. Being far from home is lonely sometimes but here I feel that a part of me just belongs. I like it. I'm growing up to be the person I want to be. Someone who still can see the world through a child's eye but has the smarts of an adult. ahh. This felt good. I would keep talking but the studying I must do is nagging in the back of my mind. So I should do it, I guess.

P.S. next up a flouncy skirt in a tweed like material FUN!!!! (this time I'll document the process)